If you had been here just a few minutes ago, you would have seen a woman in yoga pants and a baggy Relay for Life t-shirt running around the chicken yard with a stick in her right hand and her left handed extended while shouted “hya! hya!” to two of the dumbest birds ever created.
I was trying to separate the guineas into the garden so that the cock would stop terrorizing our rooster, and it was a funny sight.
As soon as I caught my breath and shut the door behind these goofy-looking creatures, I cracked up because, well, because I imagined I looked very much like my mom just then, and I could just picture her relating the story. It would have made me cry with laughter.
So here is how my mom would have told this story:
You should have seen me. Paint-spattered yoga pants, a giant t-shirt, and a stick in my hand. I was darting left then right, like the worst soccer goalie you’ve ever seen. I kept thinking that my rubber shoes were going to go right out from under me, and I was going to get a face full of mud and chicken poop.
I was panting and chasing, and every time, I’d stand upright and put my hands at my side, the birds would just go back to eating grass like they didn’t realize we were in a test of wills – chess tournament meets rodeo.
With one last effort, I looped back behind them and made myself as big as I would – which is probably advice I heard about what to do when you see a bear rather than a bird I could punt if I wanted to – and I ran and shouted “Hya! Hya!” as loud as I could . . . and a bob there, a weave here. And they were in.
GOTCHA, I shouted as I slammed the door!
Yesterday was my mom’s 67th birthday, and she is no longer here to celebrate that day with us. I hope I gave her a great laugh today as I darted around the run to bring peace to the coop.
I know it brought laughter to my heart.
Happy Birthday, Mama!