Many of us are not readers. We appreciate books. We own a few, but we don’t read, for say, fun. But sometimes, we love people who are readers, and sometimes, we find ourselves in houses piled high with stacks of books. At these times, it’s important for us to realize that these books have purpose beyond dust-gathering and obstacle course creation.
Is there sheet-rock behind that shelf? We may never know.
Here are the top ten ways books are useful for things besides simply reading and the gaining of knowledge and insight.*
1. Leveling the table. Now, for this purpose, you probably a thin book, and you want something small in width and height because no one wants to stub her toe on that kid’s picture book from your childhood.
2. Starting a fire. Bear with me, and imagine this scenario. You invited all your dear friends over for a bonfire to celebrate your new farm, and you have no paper to light the fire. What are you to do? You have to hunt down that high school math book that you’ve been saving because you might need to know the way to find the circumference of a circle. It’s gotta burn, baby. (Note – I have not done this. I ALWAYS have scrap paper on had for just this purpose.)
3. Finishing a wall. Say for example, you get weary of sheet rocking your farm house. You can put up a ceiling high bookshelf and fill it. No one will know that behind there, you just have mud and 2 x 4s. (I think P believes this to be true here at God’s Whisper.)
4. Quieting rattling appliances. Let’s just say you have a heater that vibrates with the pitch that keeps you from being able to hear all the nuances of Axe Men; well, then, stack up some books on that sucker and quiet it down. (Yep, this one is actual, folks. Just ask P)
5. Alleviating the boredom of house guests. Keep that coffee table stocked with a variety of good books. I recommend titles on timber framing, decorating with books, and canoeing on Virginia’s rivers. That way, if the conversation lags, everyone can pick up a book and flip through it.(Happens all the time here at the farm.)
What other non-reading suggestions can you offer for all those books you have just laying around?
*P, a relative non-reader, contributed greatly to this post.