Last night, I dragged Dave and Kathy to see Fame. I will readily admit that the movie wasn’t unbelievable – trying to do too much in one film, I think – but honestly, I loved it. You see, I used to watch Fame on TV when I was a kid, and in some way that I never would have realized if they hadn’t redone the movie, that show really influenced how I looked at life. To see people pursuing their dreams and to see those dreams be things in the arts, well, I think this show may have been where my parents’ lessons about being who you are and being true t yourself got reinforced for me.
So, today, I find myself wanting so much to move forward in my writing dreams and yet, I am tired and distracted and really at a loss. I want to want to write, but I really can’t fathom sitting at the screen and typing away. Part of me knows I need to simply be disciplined; part of me knows I need replenishment. And part of me just has a lot to do with packing and moving and teaching.
Thus, I am blogging it all out – trying to put some words on the page in an act of discipline and a way of making sense. I find that when I write, even a little blog entry or just some random thoughts, I find myself more at ease with where I am. Perhaps if I could just recall this feeling when I’m not having it, I would drive myself to the page more often.
For now, though, I must be with what I am – frustrated, tired, immensely happy with life, and really wanting to pursue those dreams that Fame so makes live in me.